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Well, it was really cool watching the excitement my dad had when he discovered an old buddy from his regiment living about 45 minutes from his home. Between the two of them, they pulled together quite a collection of items from their service years in the 1950’s. They had been stationed together in Japan during the occupation, and were both held over to serve a second term when the Korean Conflict began. Dad was only 2 weeks from his discharge when he was ‘frozen’ for another three and a half years. He served seven years in all.

The two of them had a lot of fun remembering and reminding one another of the things they had forgotten, but that came out when they were together.

As my dad had gotten older, his mention of his years and events in the army had become more frequent. You could see the pride he had for his service.

My dad was always one to go over board reminding someone about anything. He had told us all several times there would be no need to get a tombstone or grave marker. He wanted the marker the army would supply at his death. It was another point of pride for him.

I spent some time repairing old photos he had in Photo Shop and pulling what information was still available about old ships and places from the internet. He had even pulled out his old uniform and worn it on several occasions. We thought it a bit quaint, or even silly. But dad sure didn’t. He put on his uniform, and wore it with all the dignity and spit-n-shine of his active duty years in the 50’s.

Well, dad died a couple of months ago. It was sudden, but dad had lived a good full life. He was a great dad. Now it is time for his tribute.

But, it seems there will be no tribute for dad from the army. No. I just talked to mom this morning for Mother’s Day. She told me the Veteran’s had refused the grave marker.

I sure am glad dad didn’t see this. His pride went with him. We will remember his service, even if his country will not.

The world has changed a lot since American blood was shed in Korea. Now, the Korea they died for is even in jeopardy.

But know this: Fifty years ago, your brothers died for freedom on fields in Korea. My dad was with them. He was proud to do his duty. He served his country.

May this tribute stand for him where his country fails to remember.

So be it.

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When my father died last month, it made me think more about death and dying.

I don’t mean to be morbid. I’ve gone through several phases with this now.

First was a certain disbelief. This was followed with just being numb. Then, I talked about it to the point that the emotion was overcome by the commonness of it.

It’s been a sad reality.

Not to be funny, but death is just so final. It’s the ultimate can’t-do-over.

It makes you not want to mess up. Every moment passes only once. The few seconds you just spent clicking here and reading to this point in this article will never happen again. You may have another similar experience–But, this moment is gone forever.

All this thinking about death and dying has brought me to a really weird, undesirable conclusion.

I would like to say we have a choice, but we don’t.

We will die one of two ways. Thus the title: Two ways to die.

I’m not talking about the method of death: some illness or physical calamity or failure. I’m talking about the general circumstance of death and dying.

I don’t like it, but here it is:

You will either watch everyone you know die, or, you will die first.

They can’t rightly be called options, but plainly stated: you’re either dying first or watching everyone else die. It isn’t any better when you flip it.

I guess the best of pain and living would be to die somewhere in the middle. Then you live a little longer and only have to watch half of everyone die.

This gets ridiculous fast.

The only real choice in the matter is about how we live. The death part doesn’t change. Even if you believe in life after death, that death part really sucks. And the part leading up to it isn’t that great either.

So make the most of what is good and worthy while you have it. It will be gone.

Hope for somewhere in the middle for dying. But change what you can control.

What can you control? All the life part you’re living right now.

Like, what are you going to do now–I mean, right now?

Click to another site? Email this to a friend as a sick joke? Post this to your own blog and spread a sick joke?

These are some of a million things you might do in the next few moments.

I hope that’s the best use of your next few moments. You sure wouldn’t want to waste them.

Hug your wife and kids. Hug your mom and dad. Eat out whenever you can.

Honor God and man with all that belongs to them. Prioritize some fun into your life. Take a trip. Plant a garden. Send a card.

Don’t keep doing anything that causes regret. Find a handle to overcome bad habits. Create a place for peace in your life. Think about good things.

Regards.

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My son in law is finishing his last semester of college. He’s a gifted man with many talents. His drive to exhibit these talents in his school work is sometimes set down his list of priorities just a little further than we ‘older, wiser folks’ would prefer. Imagine that.

It’s no secret that he likes really cool video games. Several weeks ago, my wife mentioned in passing that it would be nice if someone got something like an XBox 360 if their grades were really good. Of course, she mentioned this in a whimsical sort of way. She had no idea just how much these things cost. Nor did she know just how seriously a poor college student would latch on to a statement like that.

NO. Buying someone an XBox 360 for having better grades is nothing any impoverished college student would take lightly.

Several weeks ago, but after my wife’s life changing promise, my daughter mentioned to me, in passing of course, the greatness of this wonderful XBox 360 offer.

Oh, no problem I thought.

First of all, I can’t find one in a store anywhere. So, I got online and searched for a little.

Did you know an Xbox 360 with a couple of game pads, some storage, and a couple of games will cost you around $489 bucks?

When I saw that, I started calling Walmart and Bestbuy around the city. Apparently an XBox 360 is a matter of luck. I mean, they don’t even know when they will get one. And it’s first come, first served when they do come in.

Also, the Xbox 360 in the stores doesn’t come in the same packaged bundle.

You’ll notice in the left bar of this page that I have a link to some ads. Lots of people monetize their blogs this way. Among them is a link to Walmart. Since I get a percentage of everything that is sold through that link, I went to Walmart through my own link to see about the Xbox 360 cost and shipping if I did it that way. That would be like getting a built in rebate. At the very least it would cover my shipping.

Guess what. It is there. It is available is several packaged bundles, and shipping was much cheaper than I expected.

Well graduation is right around the corner now. I guess I’ll have to suck it up.

Now, I’ll just need to find out which games he wants with his bundle. It must be nice having such a wonderful wife and amazing father-in-law.

Maybe I’ll get the thing and play it a while before I give it to him. I like video games too. Hmm, maybe I should just get the games I want to play. Could he complain?

Regards.

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I realize each culture has developed a certain set of things that we don’t consider appropriate to do in public. Many of these are based on common moral values consistent within most societies. Others are considered appropriate among a smaller group, perhaps a nation, a global region, a religion, or an even smaller set of people bound by a common affiliation or tradition.

The point is appropriate behavior varies greatly from one group to another.

Ok, most of us have a belief system that we use to dictate our choices in life and how we feel about others and their actions. Our belief system is largely comprised within the boundaries set by appropriateness with the group where we function.

The separation between our groups is easily defined by these variations. They become the markers of our cultures, religions, and of all such groups. Indeed, these divisions are the lines that form the groups.

So, the groups are perpetuated by the very things they teach. Without the tradition, the group ceases to exist. Without the group, the tradition ceases to exist. A culture is the epitome of a self sustaining cycle.

Yes, we are as exact a copy as our group could make us.

What then of the individual? I mean, the deepest color blue, that you were born to be, seems altogether dark gray as expressed through the filter of your group. How do we strike a balance that propels our unique qualities to the greatness of their potential without pressing the boundaries of our group toward annihilation?

Well, we can’t. The developing structure of a group, indeed the reason we have more than one group, is the stretching and extremes that are inherent when blue shines forth as the bluest blue it can be. We call these people among us, leaders.

Let me pose this to you. Are you being gray or blue? To be plain, are you fake? To what degree do you color yourself for social acceptance?

I’m fully aware that the eccentric aren’t often followed as leaders. You can’t be extremely blue in a gray society without developing some blue-gray along the way. That is to say: you have to build a bridge from gray to blue for anyone to see it in a gray world. There are no leaders when no one follows.

The challenge is to shine. Broadcast your own kind of weird to the world so they can understand it and grow. Maybe I should have said, “your own kind of unique” instead of weird. But, it sure makes it blue. Doesn’t it?

Regards.

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